Running Wisdom
By Fred Deckert
The running world has it’s own set of esoteric humor and bromides. Here are a few that might be of interest:
If you are having problems with your running, check if:
Your thighs rub together when you walk.
More than three joints crack when you do your stretching.
Your warmup takes longer than the training run.
Your mother starts to tell you how good you look.
You might be a runner if:
You can say fartlek with a straight face.
You can talk about vaselining a nipple without blushing.
Pit stops have nothing to do with race cars.
LSD means long, slow distance and has nothing to do with getting you high.
Things you don’t like to hear:
If you like running why aren’t you smiling when you do it?
Are you the jogger?
You’re almost there, the finish is just around the corner.
This course has character.
Don’t worry, he doesn’t bite.
Is there anyone else behind you?
And, after you run a P.R.
The course was measured by pickup truck.
Gee, everybody else got a PR too!
The race director had to make a last minute course change.
Quotes to live by:
It only hurts to a point, then it doesn’t get any worse. Ann Trason
Most people run a race to see who’s fastest. I run to see who has the most guts. Steve Prefontaine.
If you start to feel good during an ultra, don’t worry, you’ll get over it. Gene Thibeault
I’ve met my hero, and he is me! George Sheehan
You have to forget the last marathon before you can run another. Frank Shorter
If you want to win a race try the 100 meter. If you want to win an experience try the marathon. Emil Zatopek
Pain is temporary. Pride is forever. Anonymous
Life is short. Running makes it seem longer. Baron Hansen
The marathon is like life with it’s ups & downs. Once you’ve done it you feel you can do anything. Unknown
The greatest stimulator of my running career was fear. Herb Elliot
Laziness is nothing more than resting before you get tired. Jules Renard
Some of this stuff may actually improve your running if you take it to heart, but most of it will simply strike you as familiar or perhaps obvious.